Razorblade Romance (Ville Valo Fanfic)

110. Scream Me a Dream

I tried to distract Ville with Charlotte, but I could see he was shaken. I didn't know what else could I say to him.

Sometimes the thought made me shiver, but I knew Marius was lying. He did all this just to leave us disturbed like that? The way he laughed of all situation, even having his ass beaten by Ville, seemed to please him. I knew he was up to something, and that was probably it. He didn't have anything to lose, he would try anything just to leave us unstable.

We were in bed, Charlie was between us. He had his eyes closed but I knew he was awaken. Charlie's little hand went to rest on his chest, and I saw a smile forming. He held her little hand, that seemed even smaller near his huge hand. He turned to us and Charlotte made funny noises.

"What is it, my cutie pie? Are you laughing of daddy?" He threw his hair on her face and she giggled. Ville started to sing for her, I don't know who was more delighted, me or Charlie. It probably made her relax so much she slept. I got up slowly, holding her. I went to her room and put her in the crib.

When I came back, Ville had that empty stare that would always scare me. I made him snap, jumping on his side. He turned to me, examining my face. "I'll cook dinner for us, do you wanna help me?" I asked him.

"Sure, but I don't feel like eating."

"I'll make your pad Thai, I know you love it. Mine is not that good like yours, but I can try."

He smiled weakly. "Yours is just as good."

His spirits were low and that was breaking my heart. He was silent, in every way. Ville is a big person, I always tell him he speaks with his body as well, the way he moves, he's very expressive, but he was like a shadow, although he was helping me.

I put on some music for us, I looked at him and he smiled back, but I knew he was trying hard. He sat a bit while I was finishing cooking some stuff. I turned to him, caressing his hair, and he closed his eyes. 'Annie's Song' by John Denver started to play and he smiled. "I love this song."

"Yeah, me too." He raised from the chair and held me, dancing. He sang along in my ear, I felt he was holding me like I could escape from his arms any moment. He was torn apart, my heart was so heavy in my chest.

"Come let me love you
Let me give my life to you
Let me drown in your laughter
Let me die in your arms
Let me lay down beside you
Let me always be with you..."

Ville sang it beautifully, and then he gasped. "I'm sorry." He kissed the top of my head and left the kitchen. I wanted to give him space but I didn't want to leave him alone. I turned off the heat from the food and followed him. He was sitting on the floor in front of the fireplace, his back to me. I got closer, sitting next to him. The fire was illuminating his green eyes, that seemed so sad.

"Ville."

He inhaled deeply. "It's messing with my head, kulta. What did we do to deserve such a thing?"

"We didn't do anything, it's not our fault, dear. He's a sick person, cruel... We were unlucky that our paths crossed. He doesn't care for what's going to happen to him, you saw. He's got nothing to lose, he just want us to suffer."

"He's accomplishing it very well."

"I know it's hard, but then let's not give it to him." Ville finally looked at me.

"I feel so guilty. I wasn't there and you were in his hands, you and Charlotte. This will haunt me forever."

"Please, Ville, it's not your fault, you couldn't know. Don't do this to yourself. Please, don't. It's not fair. I love the way you care for me. I always feel protected by you, but we both have our own lives, we can't predict such a thing. All this has only one to blame, and that person is Marius. Only him. Do you understand, Ville?"