Razorblade Romance (Ville Valo Fanfic)

143. Prophecies of Doom

I spun my heels back, and returned to Benjamin's office. "Angela, could you ask if he's available to see me now?"

"Eve? Are you alright?" He appeared by the door. It seemed it was never closed, like Dr. Karlsson used to keep it.

"Can I have a word, please?"

"Sure, come in." He closed the door behind us. "Please, sit."

Oh, perkele. I felt a sharp pain when I did it. Ville was going to hate me for it. I just couldn't slap or punch people like that, I had to control my nerves better.

"Are you alright?"

I nodded. "I'll be fine."

"Okay. So, how can I help?"

"I wanna go back. Maybe it's too late, but I want to know if there's a way I can do it."

"You mean giving classes here?"

"Yeah."

Benjamin laughed, he was delighted. "I was just burning my brain cells now, thinking what I was going to do. Julius wasn't an option, but I don't have anyone else. I would have to ask Henrik and Dr. Virtanen to double their shifts."

"I don't know what I'm doing, actually. I mean, I wanna go back, but I can't right now."

"Eve, you have to decide. Classes already started, I need someone for this semester."

"I can't do it now."

"Uh, well, I don't know how can we help each other, then. Just do this, go home, and think about it. I don't know your reasons, it's not my business, but please consider coming back this semester. I really need you to."

"I have to talk to Ville."

Benjamin raised a brow and had a ironic smile. "What is it?" I asked him.

"I thought you were more of... An independent woman."

"What do you mean?"

"I thought you weren't the kind of woman that asked permission to your husband."

"It's not about asking permission. But we are married and we have a child together. We have to plan our lives with each other, that's how it works for us." I felt my face burn, I was getting angry. I hated when people did assumptions.

"So if he says no, you don't do it?"

But I realized he was teasing me. "He won't say no. That's not how it works."

"Then you don't have to talk to him, I can make you a contract right now." He chuckled.

"I'm sorry, I didn't think about this thoroughly. This Julius situation just got me anxious to make things, I have to think about it. Sorry to take your time."

"You never take my time. But just come back here to sign the contract. Otherwise I don't wanna see you." We laughed, and he extended his hand. "Just think about it, Eve. It's not fair you gave me hope now for nothing."

"That's not what I had in mind, I got over myself, sorry. See you later, I guess."

"See you tomorrow." He finally let go of my hand. I left his office, waving to Angela and feeling a bit nervous. Benjamin was intimidating, but I didn't know why. I felt uneasy near him.

My mind was working fast, I was so impulsive, that seemed a stupid thing to do. We were about to leave for tour, everything was planned. No, it wouldn't be possible. I had to contain myself.

I went home thinking about Benjamin's words. I was annoyed when he said about me not being independent. Maybe he was just teasing me, to get what he wanted. I also wanted to go back, but now wasn't the right moment. Sometimes I felt so stupid, doing things so impulsively.