Razorblade Romance (Ville Valo Fanfic)

113. It Always End Up in Tears

Ville's POV

We had a small break during the tour, Eve came with Charlie to see me in Paris. She never lost the opportunity to come here, and she wanted to take Charlie as well. I imagined we would have some family time to stroll around the city, but I wasn't comfortable in asking her that, so I let it go.

To my total surprise, she asked me instead. "I'm gonna take Charlie to some park tomorrow before our flight, do you want to join us? I think I'll take her to the Jardin du Luxembourg." I loved her french accent. It was different from Natalie's, she used to say her French was bad but it sounded so cute to me, I could spend hours listening to her. Maybe the fact that I loved her so much would influence this feeling, just maybe.

I didn't even think, I agreed to it right away. We would all return to Helsinki together, I was already happy about it and that made me even more happy. It was a sunny, warm day, the park was a bit full but we found us a spot. We did a picnic and Charlie enjoyed playing around.  The sun made us all good. Eve was quiet, just watching our daughter. I didn't know how to talk to her and that made me sad. I asked general things about her work and studies.

"Is that pain in the ass still bothering you?" I asked about the guy who wanted the same project as hers.

"A bit. He changed his work and he's annoying at the meetings. But I just ignore him. Henrik let out occasionally that I know karate, I think he's a bit intimidate now." She smiled and I giggled with her. "Yeah, I would worry."

She received a call and excuse herself. "Can you please look at Charlie?" I nodded. She took some distance to speak and I observed her. She could be talking to anyone, but I don't know why I got so jealous when I saw her smiling and laughing. If it was Lee, Henrik or some other friend, she would talk in front of me.

"Char, come here." I knew that was wrong but I would ask anyway. Charlie got near me. "I'm gonna ask you a thing and you can't tell mom." She nodded and I was regretting it already. "Does mom have a friend... Like me?"

"Like you, dadda?"

"Nevermind. Forget about it, sweetheart." I kissed her chubby cheek.

"Mom has a friend."

Charlie wouldn't know anything, would she? She was staring at me curious expression. Eve came back and sat with a us. She laid down on the towel over the humid grass and closed her eyes. I kept staring and admiring her, hoping she didn't open her eyes while the sun was kissing her pale skin. I wasn't a creepy so I stopped, but something drawn me to her, it was nearly impossible not to look at her. She looked tired, but she was beautiful as always. She kept the natural colour of her hair, it was lighter than I thought. But I snapped, it was no use looking at the woman that wasn't mine anymore, so I went to play with Charlie instead.

"Are you happy, darling?" I caressed Charlie's hair. She smiled at me. "Joo."

I wondered if she was confused with all these happenings, I hoped she didn't remember. I still nurtured some hope that we would be a family again.

But the bad thought consumed me all day, until it was time to travel. We caught a night flight and I was more anxious than normal to travel. I hated to fly, even though it was only 3 hours.

Charlie sat between us, but she quickly slept. We caught a stormy weather and we had a lot of turbulences. My hands were sweaty, I was nervous with those bad thoughts already and the fucking airplane was shaking like hell. Eve grabbed Charlie and changed places with her. "Ville, are you okay?"

"You know I hate turbulence."

"Yeah, I know. Can I get you anything?"

You. I want you, kulta. "I'll be fine." Her closeness was killing me, she knew I had troubles flying and it was thoughtful of her. My chest started going up and down. "Do you have your meds?" I picked it from my pocket and used it. I felt she was about to touch me, please don't, Eve. As much I wanted, it would hurt me, I preferred she kept her distance.