Razorblade Romance (Ville Valo Fanfic)

138. Keep on Pretending

"We will have the North American tour. We could marry in Vegas." Ville chuckled.

"Yes, we can. What's with you, wanting to marry again?"

"Can I put on this ring or not?" Ville acted like he was impatient and we laughed.

"In which finger?" I had rings in both hands, he looked puzzled. "Uh, yeah." He tried the middle finger. It was another silver ring, with a beautiful black stone.

"Actually, I saw this ring in that store, and I just had to buy it. I think it's so you. It's so you I would use it myself, just to remind of you. Not that I need, though. And the lady asked me if it was an engagement ring that I was looking for, and I thought, why not?" Ville had that cute, weird laugh and I kissed his cheek. "You're so lovely. Thank you, it's so beautiful." I admired it in my right hand.

We had dinner, the waiter offered us champagne thinking we were really engaged, well, we accepted. And we shared a chocolate cake, as usual, in a café on the way back to the hotel. "This city is so beautiful." I told him, as we walked back.

"We could marry here, if you want. Look." There was a couple taking photos, in front of a big church, in the Old Town. They were dressed for a wedding but it was probably only a photoshoot. I was never fond of those kind of pictures, but I remembered when we married and we did those. And I loved it.

"It's so beautiful. And they look happy."

"Are you happy, kulta?"

I turned to him, he looked anxious for the answer. "Of course I am." He gulped and for some reason, I hesitated to ask him the same. He was looking at the couple.

"Ville." I was holding his hand. "Are you?"

"Happy? Of course." He hugged me. "I have you, Charlie."

I nodded. "You... You seemed bothered by something these days."

"Maybe I'm a bit tired, tour life is never easy. But I'm alright, don't worry, okay?"

But I did. We went to Austria, I could sense Ville's sleep wasn't the same lately. He was agitated during his slumber, sometimes I woke up during the night and I could see him awake. He was quieter, and more irritated on sound checking, sometimes he lost his patience with small things. One day he even lost it with Charlie, she dropped her food and he thought she did that on purpose.

We had a free day in Vienna, it was Charlie's birthday. We did a small gathering for lunch in a very cozy restaurant, and she loved it. She had two cakes, because she chose two and we were also happy for Burton, as Leena came to join us. She was already in her twenty eighty week. Charlie had a blast with Lara and Olivia. Soon, we would have one more girl to the group.

"Charlie is growing up so fast." Ville said.

"Yeah. I miss her being a little baby."

Ville chuckled. "She was always so sweet. She never gave us trouble."

"You always took care of her, wonderfully." Ville gulped when I said it, he hesitated a bit before looking me in the eye. He got a bit emotional, I could see it. He took care of her when I couldn't, I lost so much. "You too, dear. We did, we're doing a great job. You're a bad ass mom."

"Äiti, I wanna cut the cake!"

"Sure, dear."

We sang happy birthday in Finnish for her, I saw Mige snapping pictures. Charlie was very happy with her gifts and she loved the attention. To me, she looked even more like Ville in the past months. She was such a beautiful girl. Her eyes were getting rounder, the green got a bit darker, as her hair. But her nose was just the same as Ville's. She used to have chubby cheeks, but now her face was getting slender. And she was so smart and intelligent. I was teaching her how to count, she already knew it in English, Finnish and Portuguese, and also the alphabets. Sometimes she mixed the three languages.