The Glory of Them [Bastille Fanfiction]

Miss Clark...

Nicole POV

Cancer. It's the last thing anyone wants to hear. Especially when you're pregnant. It's you or the baby in the end. Though the chance of you living is slim you can cling to hope. Pray you'll be healthy enough for chemo or whatever method you choose. I wanted to cry yet my body just tingled.

" Miss Clark..."

"What's my survival rate?"

"I see you're pregnant so if we start treatment now... 28%... If we wait... 17%." I nodded before taking a shaky breath. I couldn't tell you this. You'd make me choose myself.

"Thank you..." I looked to the doctor and managed a forced smile. "I will... Have to think about it..." I placed a hand on my stomach while standing up. My body was shaking as I walked to the car. The drive home was filled with sobs and stomach pains. The moment I got home I knew what I had to do Dan. I started packing my things, my body out of tears to possibly cry. I had cancer. That six letter word that nearly meant death. Then again I was a Clark. I drank a lot in my life. A shot liver was the goal years ago. I closed my suitcase to the sound of the front door opening and closing. My heart raced in my chest. I thought I was going to die right then and there.

" Nicole! Niks?!" I turned around, sitting my suitcase at my feet as I fought for consciousness. My nerves were coursing through me like a bullets. " Niks? What's wrong?" Your eyes.. They were pools of emotion. If I looked in them a moment longer I would have spilled my secret. I pushed you away in every way. Telling you that I had to go. Telling you that you could have the baby. Then again none of this mattered. I had a shitty chance of living. I left before I could see your tear stained face a moment longer. Only when I got to the car did I finally cry. Accepting my fate that I would be there for this baby to grow up.

"Why me...." I mumbled, turning the key in the ignition. It was dark, I didn't really have a place to go other than there. The grave site lit with street lights, buzzing with electricity. Even in this mild spring I had a coat wrapped around my frame. I locked my car and wandered down the path and sat beside the stone head. "Hey big brother... I'll be seeing you soon... I did it to myself... Just... Just make sure this baby is okay... Because I need to make sure Dan knows I'm still here... I'm always gonna be there...." I couldn't hold it together anymore. Tears once again trickling down my face. "I wish you were here... To tell me what the fuck to do..."

That night I slept in my car. I hadn't done that in over a decade. Then time just went by. I rented an apartment. Tried to act normal through it all. There was no avoiding you. You were on the tv, radio, magazines. Maybe I was the only one who saw it, but your eyes looked so sad. Even when you flashed a smile for the camera I saw through that smile. You were bleeding your pain into your work.

"That's your daddy." I whispered, rubbing my stomach, watching you on the tv screen. My stomach doing flips at the mere sight of you. "When you meet him you have to be an angel for him... Don't cry and wake him up... Don't worry when he goes away on tour because he'll miss you as much as you miss him... You'll have to be his rock little one... I might not be around... he'll sing to you when you're sad... He's good at that..." I sighed and laid down, listening to your voice. The kicking grew stronger in my stomach. " He wrote this song for me... Oblivion was the song your father wrote the first night we stayed together... I miss him..."

"Happy birthday to you Dan! What do you have planned?" The announcer yelled into the mic.

" Just some family plans... Nothing really exciting." I clicked off the tv and sighed. My body ached more than ever to go home that day.

October came in a flash. The cancer is progressing as expected. I'm sort of accepting of death at this point. I'm surviving for this baby. It's a girl. You were right all along. Then today was the day. October 30th the day before my birthday. My head pounded as I awoke with pains. My stomach aching along with my liver pains. I grabbed my phone and my keys, trying to calm myself as I quickly walked along to the car.

"Please just hold on... Hold on little one...." I groaned, grasping the steering wheel with white knuckles. My body shivering with fear and excitement. I reached out for the radio and clicked on the CD in the player. Oblivion. The song that could sooth my hectic mind. I hummed along, one hand now on my stomach. I didn't even find a parking spot. I stopped out front and grabbed my bag before walking inside. "Help! Help me.... I'm having a baby." It all started to blur, my body ached with a pain I never knew existed. Right now though I gave into the one thing I was dying for in the end. I pulled my phone from my bag and dialed the one person I wanted to see.

" Nicole?!"

"I'm at.... The hospital...." I sat down in the wheel chair once the nurse directed me to sit.

" Love I'm on my way... You're gonna be okay." I felt my bottom lip quiver from emotion.

" Dan I'm so sorry...  I'm so sorry... I don't wanna die... I don't wanna die..." I clutched my phone to my ear, my breathing quickening. " Dan.... Please sing to me... I need you to... I don't want our baby to come into the world like this... Alone... And by herself."

" Nicole love.... Calm down.... Breath okay? I'll be there in five minutes... Shhh...." I closed my eyes once I laid down in the hospital bed.
"But oblivion is calling out your name,
You always take it further than I ever can.
When oh oblivion is calling out your name,
You always take it further than I ever can." I never felt so at peace in my life. I was ready for whatever was going to happen.