BULLIED

Submission 623

[1]: What type of bullying did you experience?

Teasing, name calling, and physical abuse.

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[2]: How old were you when it started?

About age five.

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[3]: Who bullied you?

Everyone. Rarely did anyone stood up to show what was right.

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[4]: What would bullies say or do to you?

Call me various names like: stupid, idiot, fatty, skinny, annoying, disgusting, ugly, and other insulting names.

Some physically harmed me and such.

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[5]: How would you feel while being bullied?

I feel like there is no point in life if you are not perfect of who everyone else wants you to be.

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[6]: How did you feel after bullied?

I felt upset, knowing that I wanted to end my life so badly to end the pain that I suffered.

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[7]:Have you ever contemplated suicide as a result to of being bullied?

Yes. A few times but I don't know why, but something held me back.

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[8]: Have you told anyone you know that your were being bullied?

Once, to my best friend, but she didn't help. All she did later on was leave me alone.

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[9]: Why/Why not?

Just like the previous answer, I did but she left me.

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[10]: How long were you bullied?

For about nine years.

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[11]: Are you still being bullied?

No.

It all began once I transferred to a public school. For two years, I've been at a private school but my parents gave up on me because my grades weren't that good. They divorced and and that is when my mom married my step-dad.

He was a great step-father but my mother didn't go easy on him. She caused him to stress out and he would go into sudden rages. I loved my father because he was the only one who listened to my problems but once again, there was a divorce once again.

I never saw my father again and I was devastated. There was that one day when a guy walked up to me and called me ugly. I hate how my life is like a movie with too many clichés. I had a slight crush on him once but now I know that he is just a freak.

I never wanted to be a bully but I had to say that. I later on found out that he broke a bunch of girls hearts. (In 6th grade.)

Later on, a group of girls walked up to me to compliment how ugly I looked. There was that one time my teacher called me an idiot behind my back.

One day, I came home from home and showed my mom my grades like always. Here first reaction when she saw that I got a C plus, she slapped me with the paper causing me to have a large paper cut on my cheek. She yelled and kicked me in various places.

I only had one best friend. She was the only one that I trusted. I shared my deepest fears and biggest secrets. But that was the worse mistake.

She started spreading rumors of me and she teased me constantly. She later on left me and joined a group of popular girls. I was enraged with jealousness, the moment I saw her, I kicked her. I wanted to take that back because I got suspended. I ended up fracturing her knee.

More abuse from my mother and then new school. At least I had a new base (I would always say to myself) but the stupid staff there introduced who I was and as well as who I was in the past. So fresh start became a disaster.

Some didn't care luckily. But they still kind of avoided me a bit.

"You stupid ignorant b*tch." someone would tell me.

I would suffer and cower in fear. 

QUESTION: How do I deal with social stress?