BULLIED

Submission 708

I've been bullied since the age of nine; i'm now seventeen and still do get bullied from time to time. Up until I was twelve it was only verbal, but after that it was a mixture of verbal, physical and cyber.

I would be called fat, ugly, stupid, worthless, unwanted, unloved,they'd tell me to kill myself, go slit my wrists, nobody wants you here, you're a waste of space.

Everyday I was terrified to go to school, I would try to make up excuses and pretend I was ill to stay off school. I would miss at least two weeks worth of lessons every term because of that.

There were countless times i'd come home from school covered in cuts and bruises from other students throwing and hitting me with things.

The years of bullying took their toll on me; I developed severe anxiety by the age of fourteen and now have panic disorder. I suffer from depression, suicidal thoughts and tendancies. I've self-harmed since thirteen, but i've been clean for two months.

I have councelling for my depression twice a week and therapy with a professional physcologist for my anxiety and panic disorder every two weeks.

I dont know why they decided to bully me, i'd never done anything to anger them. Maybe they just hated me? I don't know and I probably never will.

For everyone who is going through what I did with bullying or what I am now with depression and anxiety, I know you're probably sick of hearing this, but it will get better. Maybe not soon, but at some point it will. Trust me.

Please seek help if you have any problems with self-harm, suicidal thoughts or tendancies. Look online for support groups or call a 24/7 help line, they're there to help you and support you. If that isn't something for you talk to a close friend or family member.

I know talking to people these sort of things can be quite scary and poaaibly even embarassing, but don't be, the way you feel is completely normal and just remember you're not alone. You're beautiful, wonderful and loved. Don't forget that :)

Stay Strong <3