BULLIED

Submission 668

  It all started when I first went into Jr.high. I always acted like myself around people because that's just who I am . A girl had just moved to town and she and I quickly became friends. We would hangout to together after school and she would sometimes stay the night at my house . Neither one of us had any other friends besides each other. We sat alone at lunch. We did everything apart from the other kids because we both were very different from them and we feared that if we would talk to them then we would be made fun of or labeled even more then we already were. We were the outcasts.

At first I really didn't mind not having any other friends and just sticking with a small group, but after awhile I started noticing that we were being looked at funny and that the other kids were talking about us. It didn't really bother me until I found out what they were saying. The whole school thought that me and my friend were a lesbian couple. I am not against gay people at all but it didn't really make me feel good that they were labeling me something that I'm not. My friend and I only grew closer and the rumours just grew bigger. I was in wrestling that year and I was the only girl on the team, which didn't make anything better. After practice I would go to change in the locker room and on my way I would be tripped by the guys. They would say mean things like you're not even good so you should just quit. Or in practice they would refuse to wrestle me because I was "gross" so most of practice I sat out because I didn't have a partner.

Not very soon after me and my friend started noticing that someone was putting notes in our lockers. Some were just one word but they never helped me feel better about myself. Others would say that our lives didn't matter and that we should just commit suicide or something cruel like that. Sometimes we would have notes taped to our backs calling us whores or cows.

I tried just ignoring them and me and my friend would link arms as we walked down the halls to our classes. Every time someone would trip us or shout names at us we acted like it didn't bother us.

The main thing that made me even more angry was that not long after the teachers started to believe that me and my friend were gay too. If the teachers saw me and my friend linking arms in the halls we would get yelled at. Sometimes we were sent to the principals office because they said we were showing PDA.

Me and my friend both being Christians decided that we would start going to a after school youth group to try and see if that would lift our spirits. At first I really enjoyed it we would sing songs eat and play games. It actually made me grow closer with God and it made me have a little more hope. The kids that went there to some of them were from our school or some went to others. The kids that went to our school started filling in rumors about us to the other kids and once again we were outcast and no one would talk to us.

Soon after I stoped going to youth group but my friend decided she still wanted to go. So she went by herself and gained a new friend that I didn't really like because she did drugs and eventually she influenced my friend to start doing drugs too. Me and my friend and her friend soon started fighting and me and my friend stopped talking. I sat alone at lunch and I didn't have any friends at all. Not long after I became very deppressed and started cutting. No one knew about it and I'm pretty sure no one would have cared. My old friend and her new friend started in with the bullies and soon all of my deepest secrets that I had told my old friend had been leaked throughout the school. That made me feel even more alone and to make matters worse me and my family were kicked out of our house. We didn't have anywhere to live and eventually had to move in with my grandma. All of this made me even more stressed I quickly started not doing my homework and not sleeping. My parents noticed and they asked me why I've been so sad lately. So I filled them in on what had happened. My mom was very supportive and she would bake cookies and talk about things together and she helped me become a little more hopeful. My dad on the other hand thought that I was being completely ridiculous and that I just needed to suck It up. Which caused my parents to fight more, ALOT and made me feel like I was just making everything worse.

We found a house and moved in just a few months later which gave me the option to stay at the school I was going to or switch to another school. So I took the chance and went to a school that I didn't know anyone and quickly thrived. I grew many friends, stopped cutting, and came out of depression. I continued to be very self conscious though and still am today. The bullying experience caused me to have aniexty. Which I still deal with it today. I am very greatfull for the chance that I had to switch schools. 

I experienced cyberbullying, name calling, phisical, and emotional . I was 12 years old . I was bullied by my classmates, teachers, and eventually my friends. They would call me names, trip or push me in the halls, put notes in my locker anonymously saying how worthless I was or that I didn't deserve to live. Or message me on Facebook saying rude things. I felt like I was worthless, scared, and deppressed. After I still was deppressed and still didn't feel good enough. I have thought about suicide a few times but have never really took action. I tried telling my parent's the school board everyone I could just to try to get help. Nothing ever changed. I was bullied for 2 years and since I switched schools I have not been bullied since.